Friday, February 21, 2014

An attempted walk

Last week, the kids and I were craving adventure.  It has been a month of being pretty shut in because  of the incredible wind and cold and rain.  Well this particular day, it wasn't supposed to rain until the afternoon and the wind was much lighter than it had been.  We ventured out to a beautiful park with trails that are great for kids.  We saw ducks and little birds in the bushes.  We saw a mom with a couple boys and a dog. Suddenly, we hit the puddles...  Zariyah thought it looked fun so she walked right in... just past her knees.  Her boots were full of bacteria laden frozen (there was still ice!) water. This was only about 200 meters from out car and we had intended on about a mile and a half walk.  That dream was over.  Back to the car we went.  Zariyah's feet were already frozen from the water.  Her socks were removed and we headed back home.  

How often do we hold expectations on how days are going to go.  Or how our life is going to go.  What if our 5 year plan doesn't work out quite as we expected or turns in to a 10 year plan or a retirement plan or a never happened plan?  I'm learning to let things go.  I'm learning to set boundaries for what is right for our family and when things don't work out, let it go.  
That walk felt monumental to my tired, overwhelmed brain. I was looking forward to the peace and quiet, but instead I got a freezing cold adventurer that needed to experience what it was like to run into knee-deep water in the middle of winter.  I get it.  I sometimes do that too... not run into knee deep water, but choose to do something that I instantly regret.  It's part of learning.  Just like Zariyah learned that her action probably shouldn't be repeated, I was learning how to let go of my intention and be on point for my child. We went home and played trains and got cozy.  

I feel grateful for the experiences that I get to have with my kids. I'm grateful for being challenged  and having an opportunity to make the right choice in the same way that I expect my kids to make right choices.  I'm learning right along with them. 


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Saturday, February 15, 2014


Today, I'm thankful for laughter.

I've struggled finding joy for years.  It seems that pains from childhood like something one person said or an another person took or an observation made can change the way we perceive the world at a very young age.  Until it comes to the surface.

My very children are bringing back memories from my childhood.  The carefree laughter and pure and simple joys.  I miss feeling free to feel.  I want that joy that is carefree and full of love.  With the help and healing from my father in heaven, my joy is returning.  Love is being made new.  Freedom to be me in the most unique of ways is being given to me.  No more guilt, no more shame, no more fear.  I'm thankful for the gift of children.

Blessings to you and yours

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Friday, February 14, 2014

Just about two years later

A lot has happened in the past couple years.  For instance, this little beauty went from a pretty little chunker to a beautiful little lady.
The boys grew into men
Instead of killing myself in an attempt to recap our last two years, I will tell you what we are doing now...

Nathan is doing great at work. Moving up and enjoying what he does.  I am so thankful to God that He has a job that allows me to be home with my kids.  We are so blessed.

I am staying home with my three and watching another girl 5 days a week.  We homeschool and are learning how to play together nicely right now.  :) She is a wonderful addition to our group and we are thankful for her every day.

Ezekiel is growing up way too fast.  He is tall enough to reach the kitchen faucet and if he struggles he finds a chair and gets the job done.  He loves helping, tickling, snuggling and making inventions.

Isaiah is learning how to express his imagination through story telling.  He told us an adorable story at the dinner table about two friends who were fighting off a thumb...  he was using his one hand for the whole story.  We love seeing his free thinking.

Zariyah is our little spitfire.  Extremely beautiful with an attitude. She is sweet and loves to hug and kiss and snuggle, but also loves her independence.  She can be demanding and can through fits with the best of them, but she is learning boundaries and keeps us laughing almost constantly.  She is a little warrior too... she is constantly instigating attack style play with her brothers... growling like a tiger and chasing until she can catch them and give them a tickle.  Apparently she is pretty good at tickling too... based on the belly laugh and begging for mercy that Zeke was expressing the other day. :)

We are Expecting our 4th baby on July 4th! We are so excited and looking forward to our journey with another little life.

Keep checking back because this blog will soon be more active.


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